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How to Make a Change for the Better

Dr. Joy Browne tells you how to make positive changes in your life if you feel stuck in your job, relationship, or any other aspect of your life. Here's how to get unstuck ...

  • ASK YOURSELF, "WHAT'S THE QUESTION?"
    Making changes becomes much more feasible once you can formulate a specific question, a variation on "What can I do?"
  • FOCUS ON THE PRESENT
    Living in the past keeps you fixated on what was done to you rather than on what you can do. Instead, put your energy into active problem solving.
  • PLAY IT FORWARD
    Thinking things through makes it easier to see which alternatives should be rejected and which should be considered seriously.
  • BE YOUR NEIGHBOR
    Ask yourself, "What if this were happening to my next-door neighbor? What advice would I offer?"
  • BE SPECIFIC
    You need to think specifically about how and when problems developed ... and what role you play. Only then can you change the pattern.
  • DO WHAT WORKS
    Each of us has strengths. Identify what works for you in business, friendship, etc., and import it into the problem area.
  • EXAMINE ASSUMPTIONS
    What we believe about others determines how we treat them and how they act toward us. Be aware of your negative assumptions, then change them.
  • CLARIFY WHAT REALLY MATTERS
    When choosing between courses of action ask yourself which will make you worthy of your "epitaph."

    Bottom Line Secrets January 5, 2004

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